monday

i waste this discovery on him
but he are the only one alive at this hour
to see it.

and i was tired, although i didn’t realize,
from going to sleep with you.
and i’m awake, and i’m tired – a different
piece of the word.
i’m tired because i want to be,
not because i’m tired of fighting for you.
i’m tired because of my decision, not because
i’m waiting up for you.

my knees aren’t buckling and i stand,
and i’m considering that i can walk alone.
everything has clear clarity,
and your voice brings a slight pain
that sharpens my sight.

i had forgotten how pretty i was
when i get sleep. when i’m not spending
every second with you and i’m able to
focus on myself a bit.
i’d forgotten, the power of physical attraction,
because i didn’t have to work to keep you at my side.

perhaps that’s why i lost you originally.

because i didn’t have to try,
or because i didn’t try to be myself anymore.

you’ll not recognize me come monday.

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